Matthew 1:18–25 (NIV)
This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly.
But after he had considered this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus, because he will save his people from their sins.”
All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “The virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel” which means “God with us.” When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife. But he did not consummate their marriage until she gave birth to a son. And he gave him the name Jesus.
CONSIDER THIS
There have been a handful of times in my life where I have hoped, begged even, for God to give me a sign. You know, a big, flashing sign in the sky to point me in the exact direction I’m supposed to go. I first had that feeling when I was absolutely convinced that I would make the wrong choice for my college education and somehow mess up God’s entire plan for my life. I remember feeling the darkness of doubt as I struggled to surrender to a new call on my life, terrified of stepping into the uncertainty of the unknown. And later, when our way forward as a family was so clouded with hopelessness, I prayed that God would just tell me what to do to find joy again.
Most often, just when I wanted him to give me a sign, he left me to discern through the trusting, faith-forming quiet of listening and waiting, instead of the instantaneous relief of a divine sign. When you’re in it, that’s a dark place to be. You’re trying your best to hold onto faith. You’re willing God to speak and direct as he has to so many others. Yet, doubt and fear sweep in to cloud what should be clear.
Like when you get the worst news of your life, and it knocks you off your feet. You’re not sure you can get back up, let alone regroup, when your best-laid plans have completely fallen apart.
There are times when we have the honor of interpreting God’s Word with some clarity prescribed through its beautiful language and history. Then, there are times in Scripture when we have to fill the gaps with our best (educated) guess because the details haven’t been as clearly defined. One of those times is in this passage, in Joseph’s story, and eventually, his willing surrender. From what we know, Joseph was a righteous young man, a faithful Jewish boy, doing all the right things in choosing a wife and preparing for their life together. What we don’t know is how he found out Mary was pregnant. We know that an angel shared the message to not be afraid. What we don’t know is what he felt when his world went upside down.
I would make some assumptions that a man, who was preparing for a long and happy future, full of hopeful expectation, was completely devastated, totally blindsided when his fiancé told him the news (or someone else did) and tried to explain how everything had changed. I imagine that in the darkness of this moment when his world stopped spinning just enough to turn to God, that he asked for a sign—for the Lord to tell him what to do.
And, in a moment of great compassion and care, the Lord brought light into Joseph’s darkness. He gave him a sign. Not in a flashing, neon light, but a light-bearing messenger with divine instruction. Joseph wanted to be obedient, desired to follow the law, but struggled with compassion for Mary. Stumbling through his darkness, he reflected on what to do, fell asleep, and found confirmation for his way forward. (As an aside, let me pause here for a moment to say sometimes the best discernment we can pursue is a nap—a regular rhythm of rest and deep sleep. Many of us are scrambling in the darkness, struggling to find light, as our minds and bodies are over-stressed, over-tired, and can’t see clearly from sheer exhaustion—let alone hear from God. Rest, deep rest can be an avenue for clarity and provide room for the kind of listening that’s necessary in faithful discernment.)
In Joseph’s overwhelming confusion, the Lord provided clarity and light in his darkness. That’s what light does. It clarifies what’s in the darkness and a way forward through it. God, in his great compassion for us, sent his light into the world to clarify our way forward. The way forward through life in him as “The Way.” The darkness couldn’t overcome in Joseph’s uncertainty, in part because he desired faithful obedience and because he had compassionate care for others more than himself. Then God, in his compassion, confirmed the message of Mary and reassured Joseph of his next steps. How wonderfully reassuring, in an overwhelming circumstance, to hear from the Lord—like a flashlight illuminating his way through on a dark night.
Now, I recognize that many of us are not likely to find ourselves in Joseph’s position, navigating our way through the entrance of the Messiah into the world, visited by angels with proclamations of hope. But, as the light of Christ multiplies, diffuses, and reflects through others pursuing awakening or through the gentle guidance of the Spirit, the Lord will often shine light in our darkness through the life-giving confirmation of the Spirit in us and others. Because God deeply desires that we enjoy life in him, and in his will, he finds ways to guide us through by his own intercession, and as he confirms his hope for us in others. Many times, in my own story, when I was uncertain or afraid and I listened for the Lord, other people’s pursuit of discernment gave clarity to mine. God speaks through his light and through his light that shines in others. Like Elizabeth and Mary rejoicing together as they confirmed in each other God’s glorious revelation. Or, as Mary navigated sharing God’s revelation with Joseph, and the Lord confirmed her testimony with his own message.
What an incredible gift that God, in his desire for us to know him, love him, walk with him, and find life in him, didn’t leave us without light for this sometimes dark path. He illuminates the way with his voice, visions, dreams, and the confirmation of those same dreams in others. What peace it is to know he lights the way.
THE PRAYER
God, you are so very good. We rejoice in your love that enters in, reaches into the darkness, and guides our steps in your way of love. Where we forget to listen, awaken us to your presence. When we panic, remind us to rest in your peace. May we pursue deep places of awareness so we’re always anticipating where you’re speaking. And when we’re feeling uncertain, help us listen with others who can confirm your light and love at work in us. In Jesus’s name, amen.
THE QUESTION
Have there been places in your past where just when you had given up hope of figuring things out, God entered in with a message of direction or reassurance? If you’re facing uncertainty now, how might God be inviting you to look for his presence and guidance illuminating the way? (And for a very practical reflection, does some discernment need to begin with sleep, rest, and slowing?) Remember . . . if you can’t see clearly right now, maybe discernment can come with the light of confirmation in others.
P. S.
If you need a little peace as a light in your darkness, it’s your lucky day. Bristol House just dropped a new single called just that, “Peace.” Take a deep breath, and listen in wherever you stream music.
For the Awakening,
Sarah Wanck
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3 Responses
I find that this particular post is quite timely in my own life. I’m sure that I’m not the only one who’s read it, who can self identify with its content. My biggest take-away is the fact that God sometimes uses other believers to communicate His light for us. Knowing this, helps to verify why we all need to be in close fellowship with other believers if we expect to grow in the knowledge and grace of our Lord Jesus Christ.
Confirmation: Sin clouds what’s clear. Aligning our thoughts and behaviors with God clears what’s cloudy.
I think most people’s perception of Joseph is wrong for reasons I give below.
There are three possible ways the story could go:
1 Mary had not told anyone of her encounter, so he believed her unfaithful.
2 Joseph did not believe her, but did not want to see her disgraced because of his compassion for her family.
3 Joseph did believe her and something else is going on in his mind
Firstly it is inconceivable that Mary had not told her parents and Joseph of her encounter with Gabriel. She is an unmarried woman, presumed to be a virgin who is pledged and is pregnant. She is not going to keep such an amazing encounter secret, and so cause them to think she has been promiscuous.
This is hardly a story she would invent even if she had been promiscuous. It would have been way more convincing to claim she had been raped.
Also we see God calls her ‘favoured’! Such acclaim is not lightly given, and suggests a high regard for God and the law. This would have been reflected in her behaviour to all who knew her.
So, what is going on in Joseph’s mind?
I think Joseph did know she was a good woman and did believe her tale.
So what was his reason for wanting to divorce her quietly?
I think his reason for wanting to divorce Mary was that he thought she was out of bounds for him.
I’d give two reasons for him thinking this.
1. In their honor-based world Joseph would have considered himself unworthy to wed Mary after Gabriel’s visit. Why?…..
2. Because he knew God had selected Mary to bear His son, and believed this meant that Mary was out of bounds – in some sense was God’s wife. NOT in a pagan way – that God had had sex with her, but that she had been set apart, and was holy and dedicated to God, therefore his marrying her would be a form of adultery.
Joseph wishes to remain ‘faithful to the law’ by not having sexual relations with another’s wife, especially if it is God’s wife. But he also wants to cause the innocent Mary as little shame as possible so plans to divorce her quietly.
God assures Joseph that this is not so, Mary has conceived by the Holy Spirit but she is not his wife and that Joseph should not be afraid (he would not be breaking the law) to marry her.
Ps Sarah, this series even with its deep sorrow is so uplifting and hopeful and must be very timely for many readers.
Thank you. (I have been there too)